The Best Made PLANS

I love baseball and this time of year when I drive past a ball field I want to run around the bases and slide into home like I am scoring the winning run. I guess that will not happen again any time soon. But there was a time I could run all day and play baseball all day. A time when my energy was non stop and my favorite  sport was baseball.

My brother George and I could play forever in our front yard. First base was the oak tree, second base was the mulberry tree, third base was the white oak tree and home plate was a hat or something dropped on the ground. One would pitch the other would hit and the game was on.

We played with the greatest players of all time. Mantle was there as was Jackson, Mays, and of course Yaz at third. We could out hit them all and none of them could stop a ground shot up the third base line. Summer time was the best at Hamilton Field and when the sun went down, since we could not have any night games, we played kick the can, hide and seek or tag.

The only week we took a break was for the fair when we showed our pigs or rabbits. It was there one summer that Hamilton Field came to an end. George was in the rabbit barn and all our future plans of playing pro ball came to an end. When I first saw him with her I knew he was in big trouble. She had blonde hair, a wonderful smile and an amazing giggle.

That was the last summer we played ball in the front yard. It is no fun tossing the ball up, hitting it and then chasing yourself. I would stand there with the bat in my hand and watch them ride off on the horse. She was in the saddle. Funny I never got to ride in the saddle.

She had cast a spell!

I had to come up with a plan. A plan that would get him back in the batters box. But my plan failed when one night they were going to the movies and she said I could go with them on their date. She cried through most of the movie. I never knew that Jaws could be a tear jerker but if anyone knows that little blonde with the cute giggle they know she is probably crying as she reads this, You see we were all in separable. My brother, his one day bride and their skinny little brother.

So much for plans. The funny thing is that life is always like that isn't it? I mean no matter our plans there is always a different one, a better one. We don't mean plan to fall in love. We don't plan to get married. Sometimes we don't plan on that third child. But it happens. So does Parkinson's.

Strange that I included Parkinson in the same sentence as so many happy thoughts. Why? Because It was not planned. It is not easy. It is a daily struggle. It has been a blessing.By now you are thinking I lost my mind. But think about this. I did not plan anything that has happened in my life. At least not the way it has turned out. Even Parkinson's. I could be fighting mad but instead I am thankful.

I was told once if you want to make God laugh tell him your plans. If you want to find happiness live Gods plan. I am sure God does not want me to suffer with this disease but he has used this time in my life to make changes and change my plans and direction that I was going.

Before Parkinson's: I was involved in everything. Every night I was home late because I was volunteering for this great community that I love so much and trying to find ways to bless the people in this town that I love so much.

Since Parkinson's: I have had to retire from many of my activities.

The Blessing. I spent every evening last week at home with my wife. What a better plan.

Before Parkinson's: I would read the bible now and then. I would say a fast prayer a few times a day and be so thankful to my amazing God.

Since Parkinson's: I talk to God non stop and I am constantly looking up bible verses and scripture especially to use in this blog and each night I find myself wrapped in his arms of love no matter how awful I feel. No matter how I feel he is there to hold me.

The Blessing: Its in the bible...

I know the plans I have for you
Jeremiah 29:11

So you see no matter our plans God has a better idea. In my plans I was going to play baseball forever with the Yankees, Giants and Rangers. But God had a better plan:

In his heart a man plans his course but the Lord determines his steps.
Proverbs 16:9

I never knew that one day I would have a disease that is difficult to pronounce. A disease I did not want. A disease that makes me shake, cut myself shaving, stumble when I walk and get sick from the medications. A disease that has caused me to lose 50 pounds, have nightmares and leg cramps.

 But with Gods plan I have a disease that is making me a better father, husband and friend. I laugh at myself more. I spill things and make fun of myself. I pray. I laugh. I cry.

You don't understand now what I am doing but someday you will. 
John 13:7

So now I let God take the lead. I let God make the plans and his road trip is way better then any I could have planned. His steps are more exciting then I could have imagined. More importantly....No matter how bad the day or night is, he has a plan and he is with me on "My Journey."

I told you she was cute!

A Snowy Night In Standard

Keith Eichenberger - Ron Hamilton - Robert Laeng

A Friend Loves At All Times

Proverbs 17:17

Editors Note: While I have been away for a bit of time from this Blog it does not mean that the Journey stops. Sometimes I just need to stop at a rest stop and recharge the battery, visit with old friends and be reminded that when road blocks happen there are those there to carry me as I make "My Journey." These good people remind me that even though parts of my body can be damaged by a disease my mind, spirit and energy are still just as strong as ever.

As I crossed the street and headed for the restaurant the snow crunched under my feet and my breath froze in the night air. It had been snowing earlier and the threat of more to come was real. As I held Krisnha's hand we thought out loud how smart we might not be for being out on a night like this night and all its wonderful stormy elements

This night was different, at least it was different for me. This night, as cold as it was, had my batteries charging and my energy at its peak. It is not often I get a chance to meet up with friends that I care so much about. Friends that through all things good and bad are....Friends.

Here we were three middle aged men and a couple of our spouses sitting down for a dinner. Tonight, we would relive the memories of childhood, share stories of life and talk about present day relationships and the importance of those relationships as we move to our older age.

Robert told stories of the old town of Standard from the days of his childhood. The son of a Postmaster, Robert told us stories about the houses in Standard, the buildings, the businesses and how trick or treat in Standard was the best place to be when he was a child. Stories of walking home through Standard to his home across the highway. Days at Curtis Creek and stories of friends and where they are now. 

Then one day in the mid 1970's that little town started to disappear and today all that is left is memories of childhood adventures and bowls of candy. The mill still runs logs and there are little stores and a restaurant that fill the remaining buildings. 

As dinner arrived we all joined hands for prayer. As I prayed my mind could not help but drift back to our glory days. Friday nights under the glow of lights at a football game. There I am standing on the sidelines next to Kym Berry and we are screaming our heads off for our beloved Wildcats. I can still hear the announcer Mr Parson's as he says "Number 29 Eichenberger makes the play for the Wildcats." My mind flashes to the gym and Robert is in what seems to be the biggest match of our lives. IF he wins his bout we win the meet that night. My skin feels goose bumps as my mind hears the crowd screaming and cheering Robert to victory.

As my pray ends we release hands but the talk of our faith continues. My heart is full and I am in joy of the evening that I am having. The snow outside the window is falling and starting to really starting to stack in the street but the room is full of warmth and love and understanding. We talk of friends here and gone, children, spouse's and God. 

Yes we talk about Parkinson and with this group I can be real, open and honest. No Judgement! We talk about the challenges the disease has on my health, my family and my future.We discuss medications, symptoms and sleepless nights. One thing is real, while Parkinson's is attacking me in many ways it cannot slow my thoughts, ideas, decision making ability and most important my faith.  

On this night, I spend the evening with the most important three people in my life. God, Family and friends. As we discussed the families and friends we were blessed with our conversation always came back to the God that blesses us and carries us through the hard days.

This makes me wonder how anyone can get through life without the three most important people they need in their life. While family is important and we spend lots of time with them and we certainly always find time to go to the movies with friend or call them when we want to chat, how often do we remember God? How any times do we see God at a wedding but he is not invited to the marriage? How often do we bless our dinner but by the time we do dishes we forget that God should still be with us? God loves to talk while you are doing dishes or folding towels. Just today I had a very long chat with God as I fixed broken pipes. There is nothing better then talking to God while you are standing in the freezing cold fixing a pipe in the middle of a pig pen while the pig is chewing on your foot. 

Yes God listens when we are stuck in the mud. Most importantly he is the other three we need in our lives. The father God, the son Jesus and the holy spirit. Together the bless us, carry us and bring us peace. In the end their love will take us to the final home. The eternal life.

I know this is true because my bible says it is so.

Whoever believes in Gods son will have everlasting life. 

John 3:36 

If you learn nothing from my blogs know that I want you there. When I reach the place I am going and I wrap my arms around Jesus and hug him and cry in his ever loving arms my wish is that I will turn around and you will all be with me. It is on that day that a new day will begin and so will "My Journey."

Number 29 Keith Eichenberger

Ron Hamilton & Kym Berry

    

Song of the night

When I Get Where I'm Going

Brad Paisley

When I get where I'm going
On the far side of the sky
The first thing that I'm gonna do
Is spread my wings and fly
I'm gonna land beside a lion
And run my fingers through his mane
Or I might find out what it's like
To ride a drop of rain

Yeah, when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
I will shed the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I'll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
Yeah, when I get where I'm going
Don't cry for me down here

I'm gonna walk with my grandaddy
And he'll match me step for step
And I'll tell him how I missed him
Every minute since he left
Then I'll hug his neck

Yeah, when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
I will shed the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I'll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
Yeah, when I get where I'm going
Don't cry for me down here

So much pain and so much darkness
In this world we stumble through
All these questions I can't answer
So much work to do
But when I get where I'm going
And I see my Maker's face
I'll stand forever in the light
Of His amazing grace
Yeah when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
Hallelujah
I will love and have no fear
When I get where I'm going
Yeah, when I get where I'm going

You Won't Let Go!

Editors Note: Remember I have Parkinson's it is hard to type and keep my thoughts straight. So please do not judge my grammar, spelling and sentence structure. Please just enjoy the message and the Journey. Also, Krishna and I will be making an announcement 4/1/2018. IT WILL BE GREAT!

When I started My Journey with Parkinson's I did not know where I was going, at that point I did not even realize where I had been. To me the diagnosis was something that was new but then we found out I had actually had the disease for sometime. Now a year later I am amazed how much my life has changed due to this disease and I am especially amazed at how much I have struggled in the last three weeks.

When I look back at the year I have had many changes. I have lost 50 pounds. I keep getting told I look great but I sure feel awful. I look like I have aged 10 years in three weeks. I do not sleep well at all and when I do I have horrible dreams. Most of them very scary. My pain is great, my mind is confused and I feel lost in a world I used to control.

The greatest sadness for me is watching Krishna struggle with this disease. She has to rub out the leg pain. She has to remind me to take my meds. She has to now do the tasks I used to do and her tasks to. So who is this disease really attacking? She is a real trooper and I am more in love with her now then ever before.

This evening while waiting for Faith to come out of the Sonora/Summerville game Kris and I took a walk downtown in Sonora. That in itself is a challenge. Yes I shuffle, stumble and at times look and feel foolish. We could get angry but we laugh.

The nice part about the evening is running into friends and chatting and getting hugs of encouragement. Of course we are ALWAYS asked how people can help. We never have an answer. How does one really answer that question? I hope I can answer it here.

For our friends and family who always say  how can we help? Or Will you let me know what I can do? Tonight I have an answer.

Pray! It really is that easy. I know some of you want a better answer but that really is the answer. Pray for the doctors this Monday to give us a new direction that feels like I am winning. Pray for rest. and peace of mind. Not just for me but for my family.

I know this is not want some of you want to hear. You want me to say mow the lawn, haul my trash or  weed eat. Well heck you can do that too! ....... Just kidding. I Really need you to Pray. The power of pray can move mountains. it even says so in the bible. Look in the book of Matthew.

Call Kris and give her encouragement. Just today Keith Eichenberger called all the way from Arkansas. That met the world to me. Words of encouragement, a voice of hope in a world that is screaming confusion.There was the text from Trisha Carr. Words that mean more to me then can ever be imagined. Life long friends holding hands with Kris and I as we make this Journey.

Then there is this question...Are you scared? Sometimes. I am scared of endless pain. I am scared of not walking. I am scared of snakes. I am scared of the world running out of pizza. Mostly I am scared of this disease robbing me of my memory.

My fear is easily removed as the bible tells me:

Fear not for I am with you do not be dismayed for I am your God.
Isaiah 41:10

So you see if I get scared I can turn to God. If I can't walk I will turn to God as he carries me. Finally, when my mind forgets God will see to it that my heart will remember. God will carry me, think for me and love me the whole way as I make My Journey.

Worn

Tenth Avenue North

I'm tired
I'm worn
My heart is heavy
From the work it takes to keep on breathing

I've made mistakes
I've let my hope fail
My soul feels crushed
By the weight of this world
And I know that you can give me rest
So I cry out with all that I have left

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart that's frail and torn

I want to know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that's dead inside can be reborn
'Cause I'm worn

I know I need
To lift my eyes up
But I'm too weak
Life just won't let up
And I know that You can give me rest
So I cry out with all that I have left

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart that's frail and torn

I want to know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that's dead inside can be reborn
Cause I'm worn

And my prayers are wearing thin
I'm worn even before the day begins
I'm worn I've lost my will to fight
I'm worn so heaven so come and flood my eyes

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart that's frail and torn

I want to know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that's dead inside can be reborn
Yes all that's dead inside will be reborn
Though I'm worn
Yeah I'm worn